JAMES CRUISE Ministries Blog

God chooses what we go through. We choose how we go through it.

Archive for the tag “Children of Single Parents”

Yours Will Too!

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Only 1/3 of professing Christian parents

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Children in Single-Parent Families by Race

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Your Children Are Watching You

Become a Super Single Parent

Surviving Tough Times

Your children may not verbally thank you for your efforts now, but they are watching and they are seeing how you respond to tough times.  Your actions and emotions during stressful times will be remembered. Your payoff will come years from now, when your children are older and believe it or not – wiser. They will get it. They will appreciate what you did and how you sacrificed for them.

Everything You Need To Know About Parenting in 12 Jim Gaffigan Quotes

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Everything You Need To Know About Parenting in 12 Jim Gaffigan Quotes

If you’re like most parents, when your kid’s first full written sentence is “Dad is fat,” you go find a book about how to raise respectful children or properly address body image issues. If you’re Jim Gaffigan, you go write a book about how to be a good parent when you have no idea what you’re doing — and use that sentence as the title. Gaffigan has plenty to say about parenthood, and for good reason; his brood of 5 kids provides endless material including these 12 timeless revelations.

On How Kids Perceive Sleep Compared To Adults
“Bedtime makes you realize how completely incapable you are of being in charge of another human being. My children act like they’ve never been to sleep before. ‘Bed? What’s that? No, I’m not doing that.’ They never want to go to bed. This is another thing that I will never have in common with my children. Every morning when I wake up, my first thought is, ‘When can I come back here?’ It’s the carrot that keeps me motivated. Sometimes going to bed feels like the highlight of my day. Ironically, to my children, bedtime is a punishment that violates their basic rights as human beings. Once the lights are out, you can expect at least an hour of inmates clanging their tin cups on the cell bars.”

On Your Actual Purpose For Toddlers
“I used to wonder why I had hair on my legs, but now I know it’s for my toddler sons and daughters to pull themselves up off the ground with as I scream in pain.”

On The Law Behavioral Averages
“Children have a tendency to behave as poorly as the most poorly behaved kid in the room. The laws of physics dictate that if there is a kid screaming and running in the hallway of a hotel, all the other children will scream and run in the hallway of the hotel.”

On The Flawed Programming Of Toddlers
“Toddler judgment is horrible. They don’t have any. Put a 12-month-old on a bed, and they will immediately try and crawl off headfirst like a lemming on a mindless migration mission. But the toddler mission is never mindless. They have two goals: find poison and find something to destroy.”

On Whether Or Not You’re Qualified To Be A Parent
“Every night before I get my one hour of sleep, I have the same thought: ‘Well, that’s a wrap on another day of acting like I know what I’m doing.’ I wish I were exaggerating, but I’m not. Most of the time, I feel entirely unqualified to be a parent. I call these times being awake.”

On Kids’ Music
“There should be a children’s song, ‘If You’re Happy and You Know It, Keep It To Yourself And Let Your Dad Sleep.”

On What It’s Like For You When You Have A Lot Of Kids …
“You know what it’s like having a fourth kid? Imagine you’re drowning, then someone hands you a baby.”

… And What It’s Like For Everyone Else
“Big families are like waterbed stores; they used to be everywhere, and now they’re just weird.”

On Babies Versus Roommate
“Babies are the worst roommates. They’re unemployed. They don’t pay rent. They keep insane hours. Their hygiene is horrible. If you had a roommate that did any of the things babies do, you’d ask them to move out. ‘Do you remember what happened last night? Today you’re all smiles, but last night you were hitting the bottle really hard. Then you started screaming, and you threw up on me. Then you passed out and wet yourself. I went into the other room to get you some dry clothes, I came back, and you were all over my wife’s breasts! Right in front of me, her husband! Dude, you gotta move out.'”

On That Cat Steven’s Song
“The song goes, ‘Morning has broken,’ and I’m pretty sure my children broke it. Like everything else they break, if they did break it, they’ll never admit it.”

On Sleep Training
“There are two philosophies when it comes to getting young children to sleep. There is ‘sleep training,’ which basically involves putting your kids to bed and listening to them scream all night; or there is ‘attachment parenting,’ which essentially involves lying down with your kids, cuddling them, and then listening to them scream all night.”

On The Secret To Life
“People treat having a kid as somehow retiring from success. Quitting. Have you seen a baby? They’re pretty cute. Loving them is pretty easy. Smiling babies should actually be categorized by the pharmaceutical industry as a powerful antidepressant. Being happy is really the definition of success, isn’t it?”

T-I-M-E

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Become a Super Single Parent

As a Single Parent your children will want and need more of your time, when you least have it. You must find time for them. Quality time. Individual time. Group time. Fun time. Your love to them is spelled T-I-M-E.

What your kids are thinking?

Become a Super Single Parent

How would you answer these questions to your children?

Do you still love me?

Will you leave me too?

What did I do?

How will we make it?

Will they be coming back?

Why did this happen?

How can I make it right again?

What will my friends think?

Where do I fit in now?

Who is my dad?  Who is my mom?

Are you going to die & leave me also?

Are we a family anymore?

Where do I fit in this divorce?

I don’t like these changes?

Why do I feel this way?  I don’t like it.

Did I cause this to happen?

Are you looking for a new partner?

What do I tell my friends?

Can I still visit my grandparents?

Two Homes—Sharing Your Children

Become a Super Single Parent

Make your children feel at home wherever they are.  Make each parent’s residence feel like “home” to your children.  Adjusting from home to home can cause confusion in your children’s minds.

  • Keep necessary things at both homes for the kids comfort. Example: toothpaste, brush, toys, etc.
  • Make responsibilities and chores fair at both homes.
  • Establish similar bedtimes at both homes.
  • Always allow the children to call their other parent.  Keep the phone lines open.
  • Give each child a calendar and highlight the days they will spend with you.
  • Try to keep similar house rules at each home.  Don’t confuse the children.
  • Set up a schedule for when the children stay at each home and stick to it.
  • Try to stay consistent when it comes to the children’s schedules.
  • Make sure both homes receive the same information such as announcements & report cards.
  • It takes one to three days for your kids to settle down into a routine once they change homes.

Schedule some one-on-one time with each child while you are together. Make them feel wanted

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